A blonde walked up to the front desk of the library and said, "I want to register a complaint!"

"Yes, Ma'am?" said the librarian looking up at her.

"I borrowed a book last week and it was horrible!"

Puzzled by her complain the librarian asked "What didnt you like?"

"It had too many numbers, the plot was poor, and made my head hurt!" said the silly blonde.

The librarian nodded and said, "Aha, you must be the patron who took our phone book."

Q: How do you measure a blonde womans smarts?

A: By putting a manometer in her ear.

Three dumb blondes came across a track lying on the ground. The first blonde thought it was animal track whereas the second blonde thought it to be bird track. Finally, the third blonde decided to try running on the track to find out its source before being run over by the approaching train.

Mike walkes into a sports bar at 9:59 PM.

He sat down next to a hot blonde at the bar and stared up at the TV. The 10:00pm news was now on. The news crew was showing a story of a man on a ledge of a tall building preparing to jump.

The blonde looked at Mike and said, "Do you think he'll jump?" Mike said, "You know, I bet he'll jump."

The blonde replied, "Well, I bet he won't."

Mike placed $20 on the bar and said, "You're on!"

Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy did a swan dive off of the building, falling to his death.

The blonde was very upset and handed her $20 to Mike, saying, "fair's fair. Here's your money."

Mike replied, "I can't take your money; I saw this earlier on the 5 o'clock news and so I knew he would jump."

The blonde replied, "I did too, but I didn't think he'd do it again!"

Mike took the money.

A dumb blonde lady goes into a store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner.

The clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black.

The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes.

Confused, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, this time to red.

Sure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time.

To her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes.

The blonde asks the clerk, "How in the world do you know I am a blonde?"

The clerk looks at her and says,"That's not a TV. It's a microwave!

Q: What does Bob call a swimming pool full of blonde babes?

A: Frosted Flakes.

How does a blonde part their hair?

A. By doing the splits.

A blonde is going to London on a plane. How can you steal her window seat?

A. Tell her the seats that are going to London are all in the middle row.

She was sooo blonde...

- She studied for a blood test.

- She thought General Motors was in the army.

- She sold the car for gas money.

Q. If a blonde and a brunette were jumping off a building, who would hit the ground first?

A. The brunette because the blonde would stop for directions.

A blind dude on a bar stool shouts out to the bartender, “Want a blonde joke?”

In a quiet voice, the guy next to him says, “Before you tell that joke, you should know something. Our bartender is blonde and the bouncer is blonde. I’m a 6' tall blonde, 220 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is a blonde, 6' 2, weighs 235 and he’s a rugby player. The fella to your right is 6' 5? and over 300 and he’s a wrestler. Each one of US is blonde. Think about it, Mister. You still wanna tell that joke?”

The blind dude says, “No thanks, not if I’m gonna have to explain it five times.”

Blonde Jokes are funny!